Connect with us


Welcome To A Faster And More Refined Search Engine

Move Over Mainstream!

Move over all other mainstream search engines out there! There’s a new search engine in town. Welcome to Smevels, the search engine of the future. Randomly (bribed) selected users in several U.S. cities that will not be named have used Smevels in comparison with other search engines out there. Six out of ten of them agreed that Smevels was a search engine superior to all others. It was rated as somewhat faster, a couple times more efficient, and almost too good to be true!

The Many Benefits of Smevels

What are the benefits of Smevels you may ask? Tons!

  1. First and foremost, Smevels will appeal to all you hipsters out there just because we at Smevels know you hate doing anything mainstream (even though the hipster look is now mainstream), which means we know that Smevels will appeal to you simply because it is not a mainstream search engine.
  2. Smevels will help you find exactly what you’re looking for. We’ve refined the art of the internet search to make sure that what our search engine brings you is only what is relevant to you. Say ‘goodbye’ to all that extra junk you weren’t really looking for that all those other search engines give you when you type in your key words. Searching for a plumber in Ogden, Utah, will get you exactly what you want with Smevels! That clogged toilet of yours will be fixed in no time by one of the most average plumbers around, brought to you by the magic of Smevels.
  3. We have almost no carbon footprint! Did you know that website screens aggravate the greenhouse gas problem in our atmosphere because of all the energy they use to display their information. Because nobody really utilizes our website, we rarely use up any energy at all, unlike our more popular competition.
  4. Finally for all you stalkers out there! Smevels has a zero privacy policy and automatically links to all of a person’s social networks without telling them. This will help you in your quest to monitor the every move of that one celebrity you’re obsessed with because your adoration of them is the only thing keeping you from realizing that you have no life and you live in your mother’s basement.
  5. Finish your school work faster! Our search engine connects beautifully to all the pay for academic papers websites you’ll ever need. Forget about actually writing that report and just plagiarize somebody else’s with the help of Smevels. (Smevels will not be held responsible for the consequences you may suffer from plagiarizing work if you’re caught by your professor who is probably smart enough to know you didn’t write that history report because you’re incapable of using that kind of eloquent language).

Join the Latest Online Revolution with Smevels!

So what are you waiting for America? Forget about having a productive life, come back into your mother’s basement, and join the latest online revolution in searching for random crap for no real reason. We promise you won’t regret or we’ll do absolutely nothing to pay you back because you’re not paying to use our search engine. And really what do you have to lose? You already waste many of your afternoons liking stuff on Facebook, you might as well use Smevels and you might actually also learn something in the process!
*NOTE: Smevels is not actually a real thing.
By Thomas Alberts


Thomas Alberts is a journalistic and short story writer who is also passionate about the plumbing industry. He is currently a student living in Ogden, Utah providing the public with his quips and knowledge on sarcasm and helping people when they need a plumber in Ogden, Utah.

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

Recent Posts

Business2 days ago

Why Is Quantity Surveying Essential in Construction Industry

Quantity surveying is an essential part of the Australian construction industry. It is the process of calculating and estimating the...

Home Improvement4 days ago

How to Maintain Upholstered Furniture

No matter if you have pets or kids, maintaining your upholstered furniture is quite a challenge. Even though vacuuming it...

Business1 week ago

How Do I Find a Good Developer?

Finding a good bubble developer to help build your app or digital product can seem challenging. How can you choose...

Home Improvement2 weeks ago

When is a right time for home repairs?

Summer is a popular time for a renovation around the globe. While it is true that bright days and warm...

Top Alteryx Competitors Top Alteryx Competitors
Tech3 weeks ago

Top 15 Alteryx Competitors

The world has seen a tremendous rise in startups and new incorporations in the business world. Companies have great potential...

Lifestyle1 month ago

Latest Wedding Trends for 2023

If you’re planning on getting married this year, chances are you’re probably overwhelmed and confused when it comes to wedding...

Lifestyle1 month ago

Tips To Make The Most Of Your City Break In London!

London is one of the best cities in the world, known for its quintessentially British culture, great nightlife, fantastic museums...

General1 month ago

The Ultimate Guide To Packing For A Trip To London

London is one of the best cities in the world, known for it’s rich history, quintessentially British culture, the best...

Tech2 months ago

Top 15 Web Development IDEs

The web development field has seen sustainable growth throughout the years. As technology is advancing, so is the web development...

devops devops
Tech2 months ago

12 Key DevOps Programming Languages to Still Popular in 2022

“DevOps is not a goal, but a never-ending process of continual improvement.” – Jez Humble Delivering the finest of services...

Entertainment2 months ago

Festival Fashion Style Tips For 2022

Summer is well and truly here and with that comes the festival season! From the biggest stars performing on stage...

Green & Energy2 months ago

4 Tips For Making Your Wardrobe More Sustainable

Everyone is trying to make more of an effort to make their wardrobe more sustainable, but often are unsure where...

General3 months ago

7 tips on how to organize a budget-friendly move

If you are planning a move any time soon, you might be worried about all the expenses that wait for...

Metal Roof Colors Metal Roof Colors
Home Improvement3 months ago

Metal Roof Colors: How to Select the Best Color for a New Roof

Choosing the right type of material for your roof is enough of a hassle already that the question of choosing...

Health3 months ago

Simple Ways To Feel More Confident At The Gym

If you are new to the gym, or you haven’t been in a while, sometimes you might not feel completely...