Connect with us

Lifestyle

But Does Speed Dating Work?

But Does Speed Dating Work?

“Does (you name the technique — Internet dating, speed dating, going to singles events) work?” is always a question that stumps me. “Compared with what?” I ask. Compared with doing nothing, speed dating probably works pretty well. Anything is better than nothing, and what’s the likelihood that doing nothing will “work”? As our cat Peri says, “Not good, Dad. Not good.”

Does speed dating “work” better than Internet dating? Who knows? But what I am sure of is that the more you do to make finding a mate more likely, the more likely it is that you will find the love of your life. I do hear more and more reports of couples who met at speed dating events, just as it is not at all uncommon for new romance clients to tell me that they know one or more couples, now married, who met on the net.

Speed dating puts the all-important “Chemistry,” that illusive “something” most singles look for in a potential partner, stage center. Checking out “chemistry” usually has to wait until the first face-to-face meeting with Internet daters. Not a problem with speed dating: Here’s you chance to check for chemistry with a dozen or more candidates, no time wasted.

Most of us feel that “chemistry” or attraction is an important part of romantic love. But how do you know that the excitement you feel is a healthy attraction? How do you know the feeling is not fear, or a tapping into a not-so-healthy past experience?

Research came out that supports both the “working” of speed dating and Internet dating. Here’s what’s came out about speed dating: Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania worked with Loveawake to collect data on 10,526 anonymous participants of speed dating events.

Robert Kurzban, the research leader, said that most participants made their decisions with three seconds. Since participants have no prior information about the other candidates, they make their decisions based solely on first impressions, that “chemistry” again. Malcolm Gladwell wrote about similar observations, that contrary to what the individuals at speed dating events SAY they want beforehand, they decided whether or not to pursue a relationship based on intuitive, non-verbal information.

What this research is not able to say though is if the initial attraction found at a speed dating event can then translate into a good, solid long-term commitment. The research on Internet dating, however, does seem to indicate that if the participants who met online used the Internet and the telephone to get to know each other before meeting, they were highly likely to want to meet again, and even pursure the relationship for at least months.

Here are some positives I have been hearing: As you could imagine, speed dating would be particularly suited to cities where you would have a big draw of like to like. In other words, filling up an event with enough professional men and women in a certain age range would be possible. Or sports fans or music lovers. Interestingly, the ages specified for the groupings are often three to five years younger for women than men.

While that follows usual dating patterns of men dating younger women, if you are older and female, ouch! The pickings (and events) are slim and far between. Often, too, the events will have a cut off age, like 35 or 40. Older folks — male or female –may be out of luck. Here’s and interesting tidbit: More women tend to sign up for speed dating events, but more men actually show up.

A commonality between speed dating events and Internet dating sites is that people going to speed dating events are there for one purpose only — they are interested in meeting someone who also is available, and they are paying to do so. That alone lends a note of seriousness, and of course, self-screens out anyone who is not.

If chemistry is important to you, then you may want to give speed dating a try. But be aware of your less healthy relationship patterns. And if you are over 40 and female, let me know if you actually find an event that will accept you.

Continue Reading
Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recent Posts

Cozy Home Office Setup Tips For 2021 Cozy Home Office Setup Tips For 2021
Home Improvement1 day ago

Cozy Home Office Setup Tips For 2021

Whether you work from home or have set out a place for something you like such as crafting, studying, or...

Garden Party Ideas for Everyone Garden Party Ideas for Everyone
Entertainment5 days ago

Garden Party Ideas For Everyone

No one can make “a perfect’’ garden party, but we are all able to throw an amazing one. Of course,...

Find Low Competition Long Tail Keywords Find Low Competition Long Tail Keywords
Business2 weeks ago

How To Find Low Competition Long Tail Keywords Using Free Tools

Keywords are the most fundamental and highest ROI activity when it comes to SEM and SEO.  Having the right keywords,...

Top Tips For Healthy Family Meals On A Budget Top Tips For Healthy Family Meals On A Budget
General3 weeks ago

Top Tips For Healthy Family Meals On A Budget

A healthy diet is not very difficult to follow since there is a lot of information available on the Internet...

Tips For Your Morning Skincare Routine Tips For Your Morning Skincare Routine
Lifestyle4 weeks ago

Tips For Your Morning Skincare Routine

Keeping your skin healthy can come down to numerous things. A healthy diet will be a good start in keeping...

How to Make SEO Work For You and Your Business How to Make SEO Work For You and Your Business
Business1 month ago

How to Make SEO Work For You and Your Business

The world of search engine optimization has changed a lot, but certain fundamental principles like focusing on target keywords to...

How to Increase Your Vegetable Garden Yield This Year How to Increase Your Vegetable Garden Yield This Year
Home Improvement1 month ago

How to Increase Your Vegetable Garden Yield This Year

If you are going thru the effort of planning, planting, caring, and growing your plants, you naturally want to get...

Why Families Benefit From A Family Dentist When Dealing With Oral Health Issues Why Families Benefit From A Family Dentist When Dealing With Oral Health Issues
General2 months ago

Why Families Benefit From A Family Dentist When Dealing With Oral Health Issues

Oral Health issues can be a source of conflict and stress in families, especially in families with young children. Not...

What Type Of SEO Is Effective? What Type Of SEO Is Effective?
Tech2 months ago

What Type Of SEO Is Effective?

Every business knows that it takes a huge amount of time and money to maintain a website. However, no one...

4 Reasons to Replace Your Car's Engine With Performance Parts 4 Reasons to Replace Your Car's Engine With Performance Parts
Autos2 months ago

4 Reasons to Replace Your Car’s Engine With Performance Parts

Performance parts are the best kind of upgrades you can make to a car. Performance cars have a higher price...

Maximum Power: Update Your Old House For Modern Electrical Needs Maximum Power: Update Your Old House For Modern Electrical Needs
Home Improvement2 months ago

Maximum Power: Update Your Old House For Modern Electrical Needs

An outdated electrical system can wreak havoc on your energy bills and greatly increase your risk of structural damage. If...

Key Techniques To Learn On A First Aid Course Key Techniques To Learn On A First Aid Course
Health3 months ago

Key Techniques To Learn On A First Aid Course

Introduction First aid training is an incredible qualification that can enable one to offer life saving assistance in an emergency....

Best Tips For Managing Your Building and Construction Projects Best Tips For Managing Your Building and Construction Projects
General3 months ago

Best Tips For Managing Your Building and Construction Projects

Building and construction projects consist of many tasks, from job-site duties to office paperwork. Juggling it all can oftentimes be...

How To Choose The Best Locksmith For The Job How To Choose The Best Locksmith For The Job
Home Improvement3 months ago

How To Choose The Best Locksmith For The Job

The existence of a locksmith is very crucial for society because they help out countless people on a daily basis....

5 Modern Conservatory Ideas To Create A Serene Escape 5 Modern Conservatory Ideas To Create A Serene Escape
General3 months ago

5 Modern Conservatory Ideas To Create A Serene Escape

Having a serene and relaxing conservatory is the dream, especially in the summer months. Creating an extension of your home...

Categories

Archives

Trending